so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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