butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
