What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
