my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
