Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
