Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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