he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
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we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
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See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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