Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
