...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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