peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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