and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
