That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
