he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize