She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
