I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize