3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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