Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Welp...herpes.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
So squirting runs in the family.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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