you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
That accounts for only three of the penises
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
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