belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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