Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
