Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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