His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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