I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
