just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
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Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
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Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I just forgot I was standing up.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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