i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
