Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize