we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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