singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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