It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
