You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Randomize
