Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
