I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
