Where is the hickey?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Randomize
