STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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