Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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