i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
