Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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