AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
