brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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