How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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