They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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