I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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