I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize