Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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