I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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