i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
this just has baby written all over it
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
