It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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