She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize