I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize