so explain again why im purple
no
Moan for me like Helen Keller
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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