# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
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